2nd Home Visit

We went for our second home visit today. A little background information. The patient is a mentally dull (this is what we call it at IMH; sure sounds better than retarded) male who is in the acute ward. The thing about this family is that all the existing members – mother, two sisters and two brothers – were also mentally dull. We had to make the visit to assess the family situation and whether the home is suitable for the patient if he were to be discharged. The home was in the Tiong Bahru area and as we drove into the car park, what greeted us was a newly renovated HDB estate that looked cheery on the outside. I commented about this and was told by the social work assistant that it usually wasn’t the case on the inside.
We found the flat and it was something I had not seen before. Though the flat was supposed to be barely five years old, it looked like it had been occupied for at least fifteen years. It was dark, there was a heavy stench (which I still smell of sitting in my cubicle in the office), and my eye still stings from something that filled the air but which I am still unable to identify. It was a three-room flat and the living room was so packed with all kinds of rubbish that there was only space for chairs to be put against the walls and for some of the family members to squat near the bedroom doors. As I looked around, I saw things that were old and beyond repair but still being hoard by the family. There was an altar near one side of the living room and it was probably the incense or the lamp oil that produced the choking smell. There was only space for six chairs - those red colour ones you normally see at void deck funerals. Pasted on the walls were newspaper clippings, apparently those of the patient who had gone out of the house wandering and not able to find his way home, resulting in the family having to advertise in the newspapers asking for help to find him (don't ask me how they did this w/o money). It was usually the police who found the patient, usually resulting in him having to stay at IMH for periods of time.
Present at home were the mother, two sisters and a elderly man who was a friend. The social work assistant did most of the talking as it was mainly in Hokkien. The mother and two sisters didn’t talk much and it was quite obvious that they were dull as their thinking was rather simplistic and all they wanted was for the patient to be discharged home, using rather simplistic arguments to argue their point. The two bedrooms were equally packed with a lot of rubbish and there was barely enough room to sleep. We were told that all three brothers would be sleeping in the room should the patient be discharged. The other bedroom was in a similar situation and both rooms had very bad ventilation. The kitchen was even more interesting. There were no cabinets but instead old biscuit tins were stacked up on their sides to be used as containers for storage. I found this to be quite amusing and creative. The kitchen was also equally filled with rubbish and there wasn’t much space to move around. The floor was also very oily and I could feel this despite wearing socks.
I don’t know what more to say to describe the place. I think that it has indeed been an experience. I don’t think that the place is suitable for the patient to be discharged. The patient’s family would probably not be able to look after this properly and the living conditions are much to be desired. The social work assistant told the family friend to get rid of the rubbish so that more space could be used for sleeping and as living space and that he would return again to assess the situation.
I’ve never come across a home like this before. It really amazes me to see how a whole family of mentally dull people are able to live on their own. In a way, it shows how strong this family is especially in trying to keep all members together.
I was also really touched by the elderly man who has been helping the family with many of their issues. I feel that he has really gone out of the way to help this family and to be able to provide this much help to a family that is not his own is really commendable. I draw inspiration from people such as these who are so selfless and sincere in their ways and though I feel sad that there are families living in such conditions, who face so many struggles while we lucky people are whining about little things that we are facing, I also realise that it is through such unfortunate people that we see God’s love in the face of other human beings and how His Love is manifested in these people.
Have you shown God's Love to someone today?