The Pits

No la, it ain't as bad as indicated in the title. But it's not good either.

I think my dad has diabetes. The signs are there and usually when the signs are there, it's not the early stages anymore. The good thing is that diabetes is a chronic disease which allows one to lead a normal life if managed properly. I'm bugging him to see a doc but he's procrastinating. *sigh*

The past 2 wks at work has not been too good for me. Stopping short of providing details, I would say that moral, for both myself and some other colleagues, is pretty low. One of my weaknesses is my inability to adapt quickly to changes; I've made a conscious effort to work on this and now it's being put to the test. Am not really looking forward to this change but it would really be a challenge, one that I was seeking for not too long ago. However, having settled into a different clientele, I've kinda "adjusted" and now, I'm not too sure if I'm up to this challenge now. We'll see. On an up side, I still love my colleagues! :)

Another matter is irritating the hell out of it as it remains largely unresolved. Let me give you a hint, it can only involve guys; if girls are involved, than they chose it. The inefficiencies of this system is apalling and I'll be doing a stint in late May-mid June and everything seems to be working against me at this time. Well, to be honest, I created this mess, so I can't really blame anyone. But, I sure as hell hope that I can resolve this so that it doesn't get excessively messy.

The good bits are that I've been able to meet up with friends. Been keeping this up a bit though I haven't felt that I had the energy to. Would have liked to work on tennis but the rain hasn't been relenting on Wed. Pls rain (not the korean dude), go away on Weds!

Anyway, gonna end off with the last bit of The Verve's "The Drugs don't work"; Wayne highlighted to me how the song seemed to end on a high and I will try to follow suit. Hope this week's better...

I'm never going down, I'm never coming down
No more, no more, no more, no more, no more
I'm never coming down, I'm never going down
No more, no more, no more, no more, no more

11:14 & Paradise Now

Rented the above-named movies and managed to watch them over the past three days.

11:14 is a dark comedy which is narrated in the style of Momento and Crash combined. I had a great shock when watching the opening sequence in the darkness of my room, volume up on my earphones - you've been warned! It was rather interesting in how the stories were all intertwined but lacked the class that momento & crash had (I loved those two movies!).

Paradise Now was rather different - it spoke of the last 48 hours of two childhood friends who have decided to become martyrs by setting a bomb off to kill as many Israeli soldiers as possible. In a sense, it gave me a slight glimpse of the Palestinian perspective, untainted by Western lenses. A particular line stuck me in that Said lamented how the Israelis could be at the same time, the occupier (to the Palestinians) and the victim (to most of the world) at the same time; he argued he should then be the victim but at the same time, the murderer. What scares me is the dichotomous thinking that one may take to resolve matters and our selection bias in quoting certain religious documents to justify our actions (shouldn't it be the other way rd?)
Maybe what was disappointing for me was that the story which was built up in such great detail lacked a climax. I found the ending good though, and through those dogged eyes, I won't pretend that I can fathom their reasoning, but I can at least say I can see where they're coming from.

On another note, work this week has been horrible for many trivial matters. Yesterday was the worst day thus far; today was better but group left me feeling quite down. There's so much to do. Will reflect and write out my thoughts tomorrow. For now, I rest easier in the belief that I'm a much stronger person than I was. And this will see me through.

Ciao.

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I dont think there is any headline to this post. Just random thoughts here and there...

Work has started to get a little stagnant and I have to keep up at observing cos I want more action instead of just sitting in. I've been putting off doing my readings as well. It struck me, however, on Fri when I was listening to a keynote address, that we need theory. The speaker was lamenting the demise of gerontological theories since the postmodern era. He mentioned that theory helps inform us of research & policy dimensions, which in turn help to form and modify theories, if necessary. It struck me that I need to read. I need to read to see the theories behind the work that I'm doing, namely Choice Theory & CBT. I need to understand and see how my organization ticks.

Thus, I have decided to make a concerted effort to read up more on these topics. Maybe before going into a session, I can try to see where these theories fit in, through the activities, role-plays, discussions, etc. After each session, I will look at what has transpired and see how it fit into the theories which have in fact informed these session.

I have also been blessed to have been able to run small activities in some of the group sessions. I have a lot to work on but I have been able to see some improvement. One of the things I have to work on is being able to concentrate for the entire activity or session. Cos, somehow I seem to drift off after awhile and it doesnt help cos I end up asking stupid questions! Anyhow, my mentor said that I've been progressing well so, so far so good. Still got a lot to learn. A lot to learn.

I must say that I've been really blessed to have two fellow colleagues who have also just joined! Though we're not posted to the same office, we met up recently and have been keeping in touch through email and stuff. Look forward to meeting them again, haha, and discussing our case study :)


I attempted to cycle to my workplace today. Unfortunately, I had vastly over-estimated myself. After about 10km, I realised that there was no way in hell I was gonna make it to my workplace & back home. Hence, I resigned myself to take a water break at the bus stop outside my old camp (Old Tampines Rd) and headed back home. I must say that the ride was rather pleasant in many aspects. First, I could take in the peace & quiet, esp along the canal heading towards Upper Serangoon Rd. Second, it gave me time to think about certain things. It helped me to see things from a different perspective: when you wanna buy a glove, what do you look for? Do you go for something that looks great, or looks damn stylo? I think many times tt's an important characteristic. Yes, I'm not saying it's not. But it shdn't be the most important. The most important thing is that it fits you well and that you are comfortable with it. I think this analogy which struck me just now, can be applied in many areas (I can think of two). The glove that fits me best. Third, the ride gave me some exercise! which i didnt get this wk cos tennis was cancelled. Anyway, it was a good thing I didn't push on to Changi cos the moment I rode into Sengkang, it started to drizzle :) capped off my ride with 100plus & teh si-ping!

There's a lot of things to do this wk, so I'm looking forward to that! With an aching butt and a grateful heart, I sign off. Ciao! :)